Battling my depression today so here are a few links to some free books, get them while you can!

My older son was having trouble at his special school since last Thursday and each day the weight on my shoulders began to get heavier and heavier until today, when things peaked and I thought I could carry no more. I did not run to escape to the comfort of my bed and avoid reality. I did not need to take an anti anxiety medication nor did I use anything like alcohol but instead, I started reading and lost myself in a whole different world but I was very careful to tether myself to reality.

Inner Moonlight [Kindle Edition]

Carrigan Fox (Author)
5.0 out of 5 stars See all reviews (4 customer reviews)
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Length: 233 pages (Contains Real Page Numbers)
Book Description

Publication Date: April 27, 2013
If she can stop blaming herself for her husband’s death, she might just fall in love with the man she’s always wanted…

http://www.amazon.com/Enemy-Know-Suspense-Humor-ebook/dp/B004TMPMJE
The Enemy We Know (Suspense with a Dash of Humor) [Kindle Edition]

Donna White Glaser (Author)
4.3 out of 5 stars See all reviews (61 customer reviews)
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Length: 322 pages (Contains Real Page Numbers)
Book Description

Publication Date: March 23, 2011
Book One in the Letty Whittaker 12 Step Mystery series – a mix of suspense and humor with deadly consequences.

http://www.amazon.com/The-Superuser-Suspense-Thriller-ebook/dp/B005K7HKII
The Superuser: A Grisham Stark Murder Mystery Novel (Action Suspense Thriller) [Kindle Edition]

Collin Moshman (Author), Katie Dozier (Author)
4.6 out of 5 stars See all reviews (14 customer reviews)
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Length: 347 pages (estimated)
http://www.amazon.com/Out-of-the-Dark-ebook/dp/B00CB8GY9K

Out of the Dark [Kindle Edition]

Geri Foster (Author)
4.8 out of 5 stars See all reviews (9 customer reviews)
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Length: 216 pages (Contains Real Page Numbers)
Book Description

Publication Date: April 10, 2013
After a Russian mission goes south, Falcon Securities agent John ‘Mac’ McKinsey is stranded with assassins on his trail. His boss arranges for him to hitch a ride with the corporate attorney Emily Richards, who is in Russia as a mediator.

http://www.amazon.com/The-Devil-Know-DeVere-ebook/dp/B00EXD7U4E
The Devil You Know (The Devil DeVere) [Kindle Edition]

Victoria Vane (Author), Tara Chevrestt (Editor)
4.7 out of 5 stars See all reviews (22 customer reviews)
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Length: 145 pages (estimated)
Book Description

Publication Date: September 1, 2013
Library Journal
Best E-book Romance, The Romance Reviews Best Historical Romance
nominee, Love Romances Cafe Best Historical Romance Nominee, IND’Tale
magazine Best Historical Rone Nominee

**This story is Part I of Diana and DeVere’s story. It is third in the series but can be read first **

http://www.amazon.com/Mestaclocan-ebook/dp/B00EZFO1Y2
Mestaclocan [Kindle Edition]

R Lawson Gamble (Author)
5.0 out of 5 stars See all reviews (1 customer review)
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Length: 360 pages (estimated)
Book Description

Publication Date: September 2, 2013
Do other creatures exist on earth beyond the veil of human awareness? Do they even now walk among us? Do…some even prey upon us?

http://www.amazon.com/THE-ACCIDENTAL-EXORCIST-ebook/dp/B0047DW9OG
THE ACCIDENTAL EXORCIST [Kindle Edition]

Joshua Graham (Author)
3.8 out of 5 stars See all reviews (126 customer reviews)
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Length: 69 pages (estimated)
Book Description

Publication Date: September 13, 2013
THE ACCIDENTAL EXORCIST
(A short novella)

When forensic psychiatrist Abigail Lee meets a baby-killing mother who has been declared criminally insane and acquitted, she discovers something lurking beneath the surface. Something far deeper and more insidious than mere psychopathy. But can she come to terms with her own struggle with science and faith in time to confront it?

http://www.amazon.com/Descendant-The-Protector-Series-ebook/dp/B003UNJZQO
Descendant: The Protector (The Descendant Series) [Kindle Edition]

Daniel W. Koch (Author)
3.9 out of 5 stars See all reviews (16 customer reviews)
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Length: 334 pages (Contains Real Page Numbers)
Book Description

Publication Date: June 29, 2010
Jason Hook has spent eighteen years of his life growing up in a world plagued by monsters. The extinction of the human race seems inevitable. When Jason and his family are forced to move from their home in California to a small town in New York, he finds that some of the creatures are actually trying to save his life. For reasons he is only just beginning to discover, there is something about him that the creatures find very interesting. Jason is at the apex of a world at war where he must choose between life, death, and the possibility of becoming one of the creatures he has sworn to hate. But in becoming a creature, Jason might just have a chance to save humanity.

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http://www.amazon.com/The-dark-side-world-ebook/dp/B00DJY03E2
The dark side of the world [Kindle Edition]

Michael T Brooker (Author)
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Length: 338 pages (estimated)
Book Description

Publication Date: June 21, 2013
When the car crash happened, Malone knew he was going to die, but living hadn’t been easy these last few years and he was tired of living. Since the death of his family he found it hard to look at himself in the mirror and was ready to let it all go, but life wasn’t finished with him yet, and nor was the stranger who saved him from the burning wreck of his vehicle and chose him as the man who would help to save the world from being plunged into a new age of darkness through the machinations of low men in high places.

http://www.amazon.com/Fosgates-Game-Supernatural-Novella-ebook/dp/B00C8PDRMI
Fosgate’s Game – A Supernatural Novella [Kindle Edition]

David C. Cassidy (Author, Illustrator)
4.4 out of 5 stars See all reviews (11 customer reviews)
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Length: 66 pages (estimated)
Book Description

Publication Date: April 6, 2013
KINGS OF INDUSTRY. PAWNS OF FATE. LET THE GAME BEGIN.

http://www.amazon.com/Rest-For-The-Wicked-ebook/dp/B007UVBMFO
Rest For The Wicked – The Claire Wiche Chronicles Book 1 [Kindle Edition]

Cate Dean (Author)
4.2 out of 5 stars See all reviews (66 customer reviews)
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Length: 152 pages (Contains Real Page Numbers)
Book Description

Publication Date: April 16, 2012

Book 1 of an action packed new paranormal series.

She’s running from her past. And running out of time.

http://www.amazon.com/Birthright-Evolution-Chronicles-Book-ebook/dp/B0040GJGQO
Birthright (The Evolution Chronicles Book) [Kindle Edition]

RJ Palmer (Author)
2.9 out of 5 stars See all reviews (36 customer reviews)
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Length: 538 pages
Book Description

What if the next stage of evolution was caused by the oversight of man and what if that oversight was a simple medical mistake?

Raine Donnelly is born three months premature by emergency surgery after his critically injured mother is admitted to the hospital, having been the victim of a drunk driver though her early expectant state is not discovered until after a series of x-rays are performed to assess the nature and extent of her injuries.

http://www.amazon.com/Her-Longest-Night-Dawning-ebook/dp/B006QKX9P6
Her Longest Night (Her Dawning Night) [Kindle Edition]

Erik J. Avalon (Author)
1.5 out of 5 stars See all reviews (2 customer reviews)
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Length: 286 pages (estimated)
Book Description

Publication Date: December 26, 2011
They live among us. They don’t know anything’s different about themselves. They don’t have a clue why they’re being killed.

Marsha Bradley is drawn into the hunt by a Handsome Stranger, guided along in the wake of stone cold killers by a tech-savvy friend, and will leave everything she has known behind to continue the pursuit.

Follow Marsha into HER LONGEST NIGHT…

http://www.amazon.com/Devils-Closet-Gallagher-Thriller-ebook/dp/B00B2F3RU2
The Devil’s Closet (A CeeCee Gallagher Thriller) [Kindle Edition]

Stacy Dittrich (Author)
4.2 out of 5 stars See all reviews (30 customer reviews)
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Book Description

Publication Date: January 17, 2013
Detective CeeCee Gallagher is no stranger to high-pressure cases. But this one could easily cost her career…and her life. A macabre serial killer is on the loose, leaving the bodies of his young victims made up to resemble dolls. With only a Bible passage sent by the killer to guide her, CeeCee will have to sacrifice everything to find him and end his reign of terror before another child is murdered.

music more than just something, love more than just living

Just finished watching Les Miserables, 2012. It was beautiful on stage and emotionally moving on film.  It comes second to Phantom of the Opera, the film.  I enjoyed the many stage productions but Gerard Butler’s performance holds so much emotion, in his eyes, his stance, he is the perfect ‘Erik/Phantom’.  Especially since he does not wear that darn pinky ring I’ve seen others wear. Too pompous for me. Mr. Butler’s ‘Erik’ is haunting and this movie’s soundtrack especially ‘Point of No Return’, is my haven from the pain of this world. If the clouds cover the sky and hide the sun, I have this music to be lost in.  Should my life prove to be harder than I could believe it could be, I have this music.  In music you can close your eyes, and lose yourself in it.  It lifts my depression, strengthens my soul and brings a smile upon my lips. Listening to this particular song, as Mr. Butler sings at first, tender then at that one point the tenderness is gone and the need, want, obsession with ‘Christine’ is emotionally warped but in a good way.  I’m always humming parts of this soundtrack, and my younger son will say, “Phantom of the Opera again momma?” and my response, “Of course my love! His voice haunts me. It is beautiful.” and he replies to me, “You sing that a lot” and me “yes I do.”  We exchange smiles and life continues.

If my life is meant to be a mother, daughter and granddaughter, ex-wife and whatever other label anyone wants to put upon me, is there nothing else? I know love, have felt its strength, if I cannot have someone love me (family not included), be alone with my soul for the rest of my days, soon I will be turning 40, and with one son who is 15 and the other turning 10 soon, what will I do to fill those years when they no longer need me?  Online dating is not an option as everyone lies. People ask me now and then, am I dating. Are you kidding me? My first thoughts, ‘who would want me?’ and then blocking those thoughts out, ‘no time right now.’ I have fought to live, and this is the life I am living. the path I chose to follow. Death will come one day for me but not at my own hands and not over something as complicated as the love of a man. I don’t need another person in my life telling me what to do, how to do it and all that.  I know, not all marriages are like that, some are fabulous and wonderful but those are shapeless dreams floating away on errant clouds. Clearing my soul. There is no escape from life but to go on. And any thoughts otherwise is time best spent doing other things. key word there was DOING. Which means live. Don’t take the so called easy route out of life, don’t choose suicide. I’ve been on both sides of that coin and I am here today to keep you on the same side of the coin I chose. Life, for me, for you. ImageColleen

 

free books from amazon. free at time of this post.

http://www.amazon.com/Shadows-Fall-Others-Edenton-ebook/dp/B00EKW4E6U
Shadows Fall (Others of Edenton) [Kindle Edition]
Brandy L Rivers (Author)
4.7 out of 5 stars See all reviews (28 customer reviews) (44 PAGES)
18+ Novelette

http://www.amazon.com/Celestial-Beginnings-Nephilim-Series-ebook/dp/B00EKS4WWU
Celestial Beginnings (Nephilim Series) [Kindle Edition]
Rebekah Daniels (Author)
4.8 out of 5 stars See all reviews (18 customer reviews) (343 PAGES)

http://www.amazon.com/Just-Breathe-ebook/dp/B00AVLTKFE/
Just Breathe [Kindle Edition]
Heather Allen (Author)
3.8 out of 5 stars See all reviews (26 customer reviews) (293 PAGES)

http://www.amazon.com/Multicultural-Shifter-Romance-Caedmon-ebook/dp/B009LVWN40/
Wolf’s Haven (Multicultural Shifter Romance) (Caedmon Wolves) [Kindle Edition]
Ambrielle Kirk (Author)
3.8 out of 5 stars See all reviews (19 customer reviews) (118 PAGES)

http://www.amazon.com/Mate-Werewolf-Changeling-Encounters-ebook/dp/B00817F90U
Mate Of The Werewolf (Changeling Encounters) [Kindle Edition]
J.S. Scott (Author)
3.8 out of 5 stars See all reviews (60 customer reviews) (39 PAGES)

http://www.amazon.com/Ghost-Graveyard-Knight-Games-ebook/dp/B0097CO9ZY
The Ghost and The Graveyard (Knight Games) [Kindle Edition]
Genevieve Jack (Author)
4.3 out of 5 stars See all reviews (75 customer reviews) (294 PAGES)

http://www.amazon.com/Rising-Dawn-Jessica-Series-ebook/dp/B00CDGPD4W
Rising Dawn (The Jessica Dawn Series) [Kindle Edition]
E.I Jennings (Author)

Busy and somewhat creative and productive day and Depression NOTE

Well I got some editing done last night and a bit today but I got sidetracked with my other love, creating book covers. I love the creativity process!  But I am only on page 40ish and Chapter Six! LOL! But I go nuts looking for inspirational photos for that perfect cover. I have so many covers and ideas I don’t know what to use. I have to get back on Amazon and view todays top 100 free and paid books.  I’m sorry that J.K. Rowling was found out to be her alter ego, like Stephen King has Richard Bachman, she has Robert Galbraith for her detective novel “A Cuckoo’s Calling”. People expect her to stay within the confinements of her Harry Potter theme but sometimes an author wants to write a whole different genre then they usually do, we can’t help but write the stories that fill our minds and express their need for sharing. Wanting to not be filed under her Harry Potter success is understandable at least from my point of view. I have some stories running in my mind that are nothing like anything I have written before and would like to keep separate.  Now her new book has been the number 1 book for awhile now.  Sorry but it’s not something I want to read. My father committed suicide more than 15 years ago and I spent the next few years trying to battle my deepest darkest depression when death felt easier than living. I was wrong. Living is so much better! There is always at least one tiny fragment to live for. ALWAYS. We can’t get people back when they die, we don’t get any closure, the hole they leave inside us is never filled and remains empty for the rest of my life at least. I have healed but that spot is permanent. I have many joys that would not have happened if one of my attempts had been successful. Lives I’ve touched in tiny ways or lives that have touched mine. It doesn’t matter how big that touch is either way you look at it, what matters is that YOU are ALIVE. And NEEDED. Turn away from that seductive darkness that whispers to you or screams at you depending….and turn a light on. Live. I need you to. And more than just me, but the world.